Let me tell you something that’ll completely flip the way you think about sales and trust-building. You’re out there trying to get a “yes” from a prospect — thinking it’s the golden ticket. It’s not. In fact, it may be the worst thing you can chase in a negotiation or sales conversation.
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Chris Voss — former FBI hostage negotiator and bestselling author — recently shared some hard-earned wisdom, and it was like a smack in the face (in a good way). It reinforced what I’ve said time and again: building trust and showing competency are the cornerstones of winning deals, not slick sales talk or a polished pitch deck.
You’ve Got 3 Seconds To Nail The First Impression
Think about that for a second. Actually, just three. Because that’s literally how long it takes to make a first impression.
And in that lightning-fast moment, your job isn’t to be likable. It’s not to impress with your credentials. Your job is to instantly communicate two things: trust and competency.
Let me be blunt — your MSP’s branding, how long you’ve been in business, your technical certs, or even your “top-tier” client roster mean absolutely nothing in that first interaction if the other person doesn’t feel like you understand what they’re going through.
That means stop opening with your resume. Stop leading with how long you’ve been doing this, how big your data center is, or how friendly your techs are. That’s not what builds trust. What builds trust is letting the prospect know you see them. You understand their pain. You know what they’re up against.
Trust Is Earned When You Nail The Problem
Here’s where most MSPs go wrong. You want to come across as helpful, so you jump into solutions. You pitch too early. You talk too much. You start trying to “prove” you’re the right choice.
Chris shared a story where he made this exact mistake — walking into a high-stakes meeting during a kidnapping negotiation and rattling off his credentials. FBI this, Scotland Yard that. And you know what happened? They were unimpressed. Borderline bored. Trust wasn’t built because competency wasn’t communicated in the way it mattered — which is understanding the problem.
When you’re in front of a business owner and they’re dealing with unreliable IT, downtime or cybersecurity issues they don’t fully grasp, the only thing they care about is whether you truly understand what they’re facing. Until they know you get it, nothing else matters.
Never Try To Get Them To Say “Yes”
Chris said something that stopped me in my tracks: “I didn’t try to get him to say yes. Not once.” That hit home.
Most salespeople — and sadly, most MSPs — are addicted to the word “yes.” They push and prod until they get it. But here’s the twist: when you push for “yes,” you actually destroy trust.
People get defensive. They start questioning your motives. They feel manipulated. Instead, Chris focused on articulating the father’s situation — laying out the problem so clearly that the dad said, “Tell me what you want me to do.”
That’s real influence. That’s what happens when someone sees you as a trusted advisor instead of just another vendor with a quote.
Don’t Solve The Problem Up Front
Here’s the mistake that kills deals: giving too much value upfront. I know it sounds counterintuitive, but hear me out.
If you give away your solution right off the bat, one of two things will happen:
- They’ll think it sounds simple and try to do it themselves.
- They’ll think it’s too complicated or dumb and dismiss you entirely.
Either way, you lose.
Instead, your goal should be to make them aware of the landscape. Explain what they’re facing. Show that you understand the problem better than anyone else. That alone builds credibility and opens the door for trust. And when they trust you, they’ll ask for the next step.
Final Word: Ditch The Old Sales Habits
This isn’t about sounding smart or being persuasive in the traditional sense. This is about flipping the script. If you want better sales results, more loyal clients, and higher close rates, stop trying to get to yes. Stop leading with your background. Start leading with understanding.
Because when someone feels like you get them — like you see what they’re going through — that’s when real sales happen.
And let me tell you, as someone who’s coached thousands of MSPs, that little mindset shift? That can be worth tens of thousands of dollars. Maybe more.
